Beehive Friday Roundup

It's getting to the point anymore where families have to be afraid where they take their kids, it's ridiculous. Let's just lock them all in closets until they're 18 and speak only when spoken to, yet we'll just let the yapping obnoxious drunms or loudmouth cellphone talkers stay in restaurants and/or airplanes and irritate us. My friend's disabled son was recently kicked out a major family restaurant because her son grunted each time a waiter went by, and they'd already waited 20 minutes just for drinks. This isn't just rude people wanting 'a quiet evening out if they pay for it,' it's rude intolerant adults using their money to discriminate, and don't be fooled, that's what it is. These same children will be the patrons of the future, and rest assured they'll remember what restaurants and airlines kicked them out when they were younger. I can't wait until people start to sue. You want a 'quiet' night out? Pay for a highbrow restaurant, but leave family restaurants alone, or soon there will be none left.

Daycare gets a bad rap. There are a lot of good providers out there who give care that's just as good as moms. My beef is more with preschool. If mom's home during the day, I don't get why the kids are still in someone else's care. Socialization is a myth. Kids get that by being with mom on errands, and playing with friends. When we were small, Mom taught us to read and write and played with us. Why are so many people paying someone else to do that now? Daycare has its place in society, too many moms have no choice. Living on one income isn't something everyone can do, so maybe the energy should be spent on helping improve daycares instead of doing studies to show how bad they are.

I'm usually more disturbed by rude ADULTS on their cell phones in restaurants (and just about everywhere else!) than by kids. Can we ban them, too?

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I think children should have to behave in restaurants, but it's not very realistic, lol, and that's why there ARE family-friendly restaurants like Applebee's -- at these places, diners should expect children & up their tolerance for what is acceptable coming from kids. As for the daycare issue, I think what it really comes down to is parental involvement - if you're an involved parent, then your child will excel in daycare OR at home. My girls didn't go to daycare, yet score higher in reading and vocabulary than their daycare-schooled counterparts. My sil sent her son to daycare & he doesn't suffer from behavioral issues. The key is parenting, plain & simple. A good, involved parent is going to have a happy, successful child, whether they attend daycare or stay at home. :)

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I think something does need to be done about children's behavior in restuarants. NO...It is not the children's fault it is the parents that do not teach their children manners or how to behave in public settings. I think there should be a section of the restaurant for children/families and another child-free zone. This could be benefical for all parties involved....The people without children could enjoy a quiet meal. The other side of the restaurant could have a special children's theme, crayons on the table, or even toys available. The parents would probably even have a better dining experience if the children are entertained and they are not having to worry about offending other patrons since everyone in the section has children.

I don't think the problem is with kids being kids. Everyone knows they cry occasionally or have to be reminded to use indoor voices. It's the families who really incringe on others that are the problem: crawling under tables, running around, yelling, throwing things; meanwhile the parents remain silent. "Family restaurant" does not mean McDonalds playground.

I think people with children should take their kids to family friendly restuarants instead of letting them spoil everyone else's evening. I personally cannot stand having someone's loud-mouthed, ill-behaved child running past my table and screaming in my ear. My older sister has two children. She doesn't take them to nice places. She takes them to Applebee's and Red Robin, places where children belong. You don't take a screaming two year old to Maggiano's unless you've rented the place out for a party. It's called being respectful of others. I'm sick of people with children thinking that they should have all the rights in the world. I'm also sick to death of people not raising their kids. My mother had four kids and we all behaved like angels in public. We never acted up because we knew what was expected.

I am sure you did behave like an angel in public as a child, Pretty In Pink. I can tell you were an angel from the tone of your reply.

Children are children. They should be allowed in whatever restaurant their parents want to take them to, and they should behave. If children bother you that much, perhaps you should stay home. In order for children to know how to behave in public, they must be in public from time to time. Most of the children I know are just fine in restaurants.

Personally i wont take my children anywhere if they can't behave. If they can't sit at the table properly and eat their food then they will have to stay home. I was out with a friend who brought her four year old daughter to lunch. She let her crawl under the table and play with the sugar and salt. She spilt it everywhere then her mom said,"No no. We don't do that sweetie."
I think our society definately lacks manners in all age groups. What happened to respecting your elders and all adults with authority. I hate being in line at the grocery store when the person is talking loudly on their cell phone about things like her husband and her sex life! I don't want to know that!
Please and thank you are rarely heard anymore. Discipline (not necessarily spanking) is used anymore! My parents displined me and i don't love them any less, I actually love them more. The people I went to school with who weren't displined and were left to do what ever they want. Well they are the ones on the cell phone with the rude kids.

Sadie, I agree - I've actually gotten up and left restaurants, as I've done in other places, due to my kids acting out. Usually it means they're better off at home and it's not fair to them to keep them somewhere they don't want to be, any more than it's fair to allow them to misbehave while others are trying to eat, shop, etc. Thankfully, I've only had to leave a couple of times and they got the message really quickly that certain behaviors are NOT acceptable in public - period. And it's not fair to expect others, whether they have children or not, to simply accept the fact that "kids will be kids". Sure, kids will be kids, and they will misbehave, but the parent's response to that behavior helps to determine the happiness or misery of everyone involved, including the child. It is not a given that just because you have children, those children are to be allowed anywhere you go - some places just are NOT meant for children.

Pretty in pink and Sadie:
Can I get an AMEN?!!!!! I can't stand parents who don't know how handle their own children and think its okay to let them act anyway they want. That also goes for movie theaters - please don't bring babies to evening movies - we pay a lot of money to see a movie these days and when I walk into a theater and see a parent with a child, I cringe and wonder how long it will be before the baby starts crying and or screaming.
Also, I couldn't agree more with Sadie - it seems most people have absolutely no manners anymore and know NOTHING about common courtesy. Its to the point where I'm shocked or suprised when someone says please or thank you or actually holds the door for someone else.

I understand the need to restrain the wild kids, but most kids I've seen at restaurants, while loud and squirmy, hardly deserve to be banned. They're kids. They're going to be loud, and they're going to be squirmy. Like others said, it's people talking loudly on their cell phones that annoy me. I'll use my cell phone but I try to keep people from hearing every word of my conversation.

What a sad state America is in, kids must be perfect and of course so many have perfect kids. It's that type of mentality that causes complete intolerance for parents of kids who have behavioral issues beyond 'what a brat.' Apparently we should never leave our homes, we might upset perfect families.

Get a grip, children are our future and manners are one thing, but guess what, manners and tolerance works both ways. A lot of people would get a big fat 'mind your beeswax' from me. Don't like kid noise? Go to your fancy restaurant but in a family restaurant, deal with it without inflicting your rigidity onto others. Kids have to be adults soon enough, there's a happy medium where they can be fun and crotchety people can learn a thing or two.

Yes, Delia, manners and tolerance work both ways. But even in a "family" restaurant, are there not some minimum standards for tolerable behavior?